Things which are never happening for me (or I'd like me some good ole' shaking of the Universe to surprise me) until the crows turn white or unicorns replace DMRC.
1) Being in a healthy, happy relationship (dating) with a straight, single man who likes typography and can bring witty banter to the table with some gourmet junk food on a date night (butcher's shop story, anyone?)
2) Driving a damn car
3) Losing Weight
4) Scholarship
5) Sex with Adam Levine
6) Doctorate
7) Finishing deadlines for this semester
8) Julie Hewett's Sin Noir and Nars' Seduction Empress
9) Cheaper, affordable technology
10) A gig that allows me to look smashing and play some on the side
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| Far more realistic than the items on this list |
| Pizza alone is the perfect match on Tinder |
2) Driving a damn car
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| Auto, always |
3) Losing Weight
| You know you're fat when your mother cracks 'Yo Daughter so fat' jokes on you |
4) Scholarship
| Slash NET Slash Job Slash New York Slash LA Slash Roppongi |
5) Sex with Adam Levine
| The only time when my homefries and I share a choice |
6) Doctorate
| This image does not reflect the chances of scholarship and proposal being approved which leads us to the next image |
| Ryan Father of one child Gosling as a reward. Bitches can dream. |
7) Finishing deadlines for this semester
| Spatial and temporal realities are damned this semester |
8) Julie Hewett's Sin Noir and Nars' Seduction Empress
| Every make-up store in Dubai, Bangkok and Paris, ever |
9) Cheaper, affordable technology
| How do you explain the Apple family? |
10) A gig that allows me to look smashing and play some on the side
| Now, is Prince Harry willing to be my groupie? |
The thing about dick is. I don't have one.
But, I am one.
But, I am one.

