Time Traveller's narcissism.
Monday, April 22, 2013Dear 17 year old Snobster,
How was school today? Did you come back in one of your 'rare' cheerful moods only to be ruined by accountancy tuition where your crush didn't show up and balance sheets didn't tally? Or are you doing Analysis, the thin green book? Wait till the frustration of balance sheets that don't tally settle in. They'll make troubles with the baby sister seem like a dream.
I see you're still swooning over the pink tshirt crush.There'll be a day when he'll "thank" you for lending him your pen and you'll mark it as a life event, a breakthrough in your 17 year old existence. Trust me, not worth it. The dude failed his first year of college. Get over him. He's a loser. You're welcome. The other major crush will emerge out as a perennial crush. Your 21 year old self has become better around the person but still lets out a shriek or two in her head when she thinks about him. Also, it's great to invest in the dude. Completely worth it. He's going to make it big in time to come. You'll be proud of your choice as opposed to other teenagers hooking up with anyone and everyone. Remember, quality over quantity.
Don't abandon music because of silly competition fiasco in August. Keep practicing bass with the help of online tutorials available on YouTube. You'll find a teacher to help you with basics and you're going to play a fair bit as opposed to other failed guitarists in the next 3-4 years to come. You will also get in touch with your favourite indie band and they won't remain your favourite because of overdose of their music. I won't give away anything else but let me assure you, you will be in close proximity to them and you'll find friends in those guys for a lifetime. Don't waste time figuring out N and ignoring him in general. He's a great guy to be friends with and he respects you for the same. Also, you're going to earn respect with writing. So keep at both the things.
Writing brings us to next dimension. Pick up any and all opportunities you find to publish your work. Don't question the authenticity. Very rarely will there be a case that'll bring you down. However, change your style a bit. Don't edit more. Write more, edit less. The same applies to the work of others that you'll be asked to edit.
You'd feel I'm ignoring the part of how to deal with school and getting into college and instead harping about co-curriculars and friends. Relax. You will be do very well in the boards and yet not make it to the college of your choice. Instead, you'll land up a some place better where you'll find friends for lifetime, teachers who will love you and people who will respect you for the person you'll become. Essentially, there's major transformation on the cards. From the thug, uninhibited convent school girl you're going to turn into an uptight, well behaved "girl". Also, keep your determination strong. This will help you in college a fair bit.
Reiterating, don't worry about school. It'll pass smoothly. Just keep away from so called "best friends". You'll know at the end of the session why.
One advice, start driving. Push mum to let you takeout her old car and begin the lessons. You'll hate to know that until about 3 months you'd be ferrying around in auto and disposal of friends who'd drop you home at the end of those late nights. Yes, you read it correct. Late nights that will involve a fair bit of alcohol, good music, smoking and friends to last you for a while. This would become like a comfortable routine. You've earned it all. I am telling you this with honesty. You deserve all this. Just don't question anything that happens during first six months in the college. Everything will fall in place and you'll love all these mofos.
I am not addressing the uncomfortable question of finding a soulmate of some order because honey, let's face it. Your 17 year old cynical self is still the same. Only worse, perhaps. You will be unable to hold the attention of any guy for over 34 days because they're all cunts and you, you are special. You don't deserve a regular bloke. You deserve someone who doesn't exist. Better turn to asexuality soon. You'll only find heartbreaks after every quarter while your acquaintances from school and college will end up marrying their childhood sweethearts. You won't even be invited to their weddings so you should be aware that people in school don't deserve your sympathy. Ignore them and read the Sartre you borrowed from library.
I feel I'm holding you far too long here and you're a nice girl. At least back then you were. Too simple for the world outside. I'd take your leave here with one suggestion, don't dye your hair. You'll regret it. And, keep buying earrings. You'll have the most exquisite pieces in the city.
Love,
Snobster (age 21)
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