If I could

Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Can I design a dream?

I want to be lost in the wings at R.K. Dalmia auditorium. Lights off, curtains off. Empty auditorium. Only visible light in the seating area, once I set my amp. I want to feel the pressure to be able to match to the drummer and the singers. I want to feel the power that produced something worthwhile, even if it meant plucking a note over and over again. I want to be in my red tunic and black pant uniform, looking for a tissue paper to fix my kohl, 14 minutes before we're set to go on stage. I want to hang in the green room with familiar faces, the ones who'd be sweating over hitting the right note. It's all predictable, it's all about achieving it in the moment. You don't plan such things.

The only control you have is to alter the notes that determine a track, a melody which is all reminiscent of a particularly bright moment shared. One bit of appreciation, that could lift me.

I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned

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