Thots while photographing the self—

Okay, this angle is definitely not working. 

Wait, that's how they look on screen?

Jesus fuck, they're not the same size. 

Shit, this isn't aesthetically pleasing. 

Oh, so the camera does indeed add weight. 

Shit, no more carbs. 

Wow, man, it takes a village to really look good then. 

Wait, is this an awkward angle?

More respect to everyone who's ever done this.

Dude, the washroom looks good but I don't. 

More respect to everyone who's ever done this and looked good while at it. 

My phone needs to stop vibrating cause otherwise it's gonna fall in the fucking pot. 

Every dollar people spend on OF is worth it, I guess then?

Fuck, should have not had bread for dinner. 

How do people, just like, do this?

WHY ARE THEY SAGGING THIS MUCH?

How are people able to take these in their washroom and look good? 

Really bold of one to try this after knowing all about Pegasus. 

Am I too old for this? I think I am too old for this. 

I hate confident people

Sooo, this can't be a side career now that we know we suck at it. 

Shit, are my best mammilla years past me?

Okay, this is so cliched, yuck.

Did you really go to a film school and learned photography if you can't do this right?

For all the years of professional visual research, you don't have a mood board and reference shots? SHAME. 

Dude, how do people come to terms with their bodies?

Fuck, I really need to stop the carbs. 

Should I tell my therapist about it?

Should I tell my best friend about it?

I should tell a stranger from Twitter about it. 

What a loss for my Tinder match who I am ghosting. Heha. 

Wait okay, I think we should do something art-sy like add a shock value element?

Okay, are we going to try that pose? 

Right, the face is covered and we can take this.

Shit, it's too artsy. 

But is it? I think a b/w filter and some contrast can really bring out the outfit.

The point is not to bring out the outfit but your skin instead. 

Wait, what.

ARE YOU TELLING ME NO BLACK AND WHITE PRESET LOOKS SWELL ON THE BOD?

Shit man, it can't be this complicated. Dumb people do this all the time.

Honestly, bank work is easier than this pile of horseshit. And bank work is the worst kinda way to waste your time. 

But like, do I want to keep a memory of this or should I completely dispose off?

Wait, how do I share these? Like do I send it with a message or just randomly drop them?

Okay, editing your body is fucking weird. Nobody talks about it at the film school but they should.

Where can I do a course to become an intimacy coordinator? I'd be SO good at it!

Should I add more contrast and make it like an artsy photoshoot?

More grain? 

Okay, my skin looks like trash when it isn't.

Honestly, my face is photogenic but the body is just MEH. 

Shit man, do I really look like this? Yuck. 

I'd never fuck me.