Straight no chaser

Friday, August 07, 2015

A whole bunch of people I've gotten to know over the last few years are leaving the country in the next week or so. In so far as we have come since graduation, people leaving should come as naturally as breathing. It's a very elementary fact, whatever comes in- goes out/goes around. Whatever, your pattern be, you will complete a round and move. Or several, and then proceed to move. However, with each year, the number of people willing to stay around is severely dwindling. It's almost as if, every single person I've known has made it as a promise to vacate this town and drop the bomb. I'm not denying it's easy on them but the fact of the matter is, they have a whole empty canvas of a life to fill in a new space. For those of us who remain right where they were, it's nothing more than holding on to old receipts, which may remind you of a good evening/afternoon you had with them. Maybe, several such with the number of receipts you've accumulated in your head. If you're a hoarder like me, nobody can save you from drowning in a downward spiral. I cannot possibly deal with this. 

I don't know how people do farewells, I can't. I saw someone off today and am going to see someone off tomorrow. Day before, I saw someone over drinks- someone who pushed me into starting this blog and has pretty much been one of the oldest friend from school. It's routine now- check yourself in one of the places they will miss when they're gone, be forced into smiling for multiple ugly selfies with them and eat ton of carbs to make up for all the pent up anger and sadness frozen in your wailing body. The same which has a guilt ridden chest of being rooted to the same spot for over twenty years, for counting down time the way you did- seven years ago and for knowing none of this is worth it. 

Speaking of farewells, at one such recently I was asked (read reminded), ironically by someone who is leaving three weeks before the birthday, about my birthday.

 "It's so far away. Why are you asking me?" I said nonchalantly and wrapped the topic,

To all those who asked me to grow up, I hope you're happy. I really do.

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