Ghost Duet

Thursday, July 16, 2020

I had a normal day today. 

Let me reiterate, I HAD A NORMAL DAY TODAY. 

My normal day included starting the day in time (okay 12 noon) and hitting the shower straight. Quick lunch followed by a mug of Americano led into an Art workshop that I grumbled about for an hour and a half and panicked when I was asked to present my opinion to strangers. However, the strangers loved hearing everything I had to say and I realized, I know just as much as the woman giving the workshop and it's just my bad luck that I'm in the spot that I am. All this was followed by three (not one, not two) whole fucking phone calls separately with three of my closest friend's from school. One of whom (Baniya) is heavily pregnant and she told me about it this morning (yay, early morning), followed by wishing another (Ana Banana) on her birthday and catching up on her post-covid life and disguised unemployment and finally with AP, who's one of the oldest, dearest friend's I have and one of the first and regular feature on my blog for years. She's the one who pulled the whole con call calling out episode with me on that freak of a woman I went to school with. AP is unapologetically badass, the only woman I'd ever use that word for cause truly, she can terrify the devil. Any call with school friends means you do not have to explain facets about your personality through random episodes; they just know it. 

Case in point:

"Are you planning to get married anytime?"

No, have you lost it? 

"No, I mean, if you are, you should know the planning stage lasts 2-3 years and knowing you, there's no way in hell your parents are even going to attempt that for you."

HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT? I HAVE HAD TO EXPLAIN THIS TO EVERYONE WHO HAS BRIEFLY BROUGHT MY MARRIAGE INTO THE CONVERSATION. YOU KNOW, MY MOM SAID THE SAME. 

"Save it. I know you, I know you better than anyone else and I know the person you and that nobody but you can find someone for yourself. You should start looking out if you have any plan whatsoever."

Thank god for friends from school. Whatever few if I may say. Thank god for AP being one of them. 

I prepared and ate my dinner through the call because I didn't want to hang up and I also didn't want the normalcy to end.

I joined my family on the dinner table to find them eating Dal and Chawal; the two food items I've detested all my life and truth be told, I don't remember the last time I saw my family on the dinner table with Dal and Chawal. It's been years since this was made for dinner for us all. 

All in all, a day that resembled any average day from 2007-2013. I was painfully aware of how far away I have been from even semblance of normalcy, of being wanted in a day for work, for information, for socializing, for anything that needs me to be me. 

Kids, don't take normal days and an average life for granted. 

It takes a lot to put it together. A lot. 




(Title reference; track of the day)

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