Scratch [!]

Thursday, October 09, 2008

A close girlfriend of mine has this irritating habit.Whenever she is doing something,particularly in the cyber world and she has to zero on a "password", she'd invariably keep it like any random object from her surrounding.I'm not revealing,who that pally is,but hey after a while the whole process tickled my funny bone.This one time I remember in the 10 grade,her internet was screwed up and she had to check some information,so she'd ask me to do the same on her behalf.I snapped back,"dude you gotta give me the password then,if its in your inbox..",I was fairly convinced it was something edgy and outrageously bold,since she was like that,but what turned out,"yeah sure,its modimirror..."..;"what the.. sorry could you spell it..".Yes this is what I usually do when I'm confused or rather amused.The conversation was not over.She said,"M-O-D-I-M-I-R-R-O-R" ,and confirmed my horror and yet again I began questioning,"Hmmm very interesting..But could you tell me the etymology of this[No I didnt use the standard jargon,that's what I said in mind] sorry the thing what provoked you to keep this.",; "Oh that,now see,I have so many accounts,its tough keeping a Bond type of thing yaar,so while I was wondering what should be the one,I happen to see the mirror,placed right infront of my P.C..bas.."
Funnily enough,most of her passwords were and still are like that..
Ofcourse we are still great buddies and I'm not telling you what are the new and VAGUE passwords like but still,being a girl,and surviving here is all like a Chick-lit of its own.Each day a new story is woven,an anecdote told; and if you happened to study by chance in my school by my language teachers you'd precisely know that its perhaps the birthplace of any feminist,emancipating the status of a person,who's not a girl,not yet a women...Ofcourse while all this happens,it just cant be thrust like a subject on your head.It all depends on YOU.You are at a liberty to:-
a-Listen to the thing,feel good in your head,take part in the debate.Jubliant.
b-Choose the avoid-me seat,munch on funnily smelling mango pickle with butter bathed paranthas while occasionaly mocking the orator.
While I personally advocate plan a to anyone who's bound to attend one such class,I'd also suggest to maintain plain distance from people who fall into category b.The simple rule here is,if you are either bored or android,you can perhaps feign a headache/neck ache or any fuck on Earth,rather than laughing from the corner of your lips.Its so cheap I say.
Continuing on the same note,I've heard rather Bad stories from my friends [Goldhawk/Motherjane]about their time in college with their fellow wierd classmates and such shit.Now why I insist on using the word wierd is probably because I was thoroughly convinced that the crowd I've been with through all these years,was just the heights of well..erm..Himesh..err no well WIERD..yeah and they felt the same about me.Now I've never heard Spellbee sounding so depressed and twitched on phone.It was one of the trio's Aye-Same-Ass cum 3 am conversation,where Motherjane was drunk,and Spellbee who is here kept repeating,"Sympathise with me,for Spelling's sake!.Oh jeez,I dunno what's wrong with my vocabulary,my grammar..just everything..That place [insert a random timbucktoo sorts non-existing city] just sucks.You have no idea what diabloic crowd surrounds me like a thick cloud".
I was all clot after a patient round of her wailings,because she got into better places but chose that wierd city because it also happened to be her hometown[mind you she's not all that homely].Coming back to the vent-a-thon-on-phone,
"But dude,I saw all your pictures ,and not to forget,last time we'd talked you weren't all that depressed,..".
I was cut by her long screech again which she launched into a speech,
" look ok,I was told I'm Dilli ki bigdi hui ladki and some shit happened...and even when you remove that you wanna listen to me about my roomie-?".
Hello here we were confirming our plan to meet up and she was badly craving for a bitchslap.Being a good listener and attentive wannabe journalist,i asked,
" dude what is this roomie-? isn't it suppose to be Homie? after all the Happy-and Gay action there? Go on..I am a game :)"."ok,she started again almost cutting me," so this person is a Bong and ..(me screaming)..wait there's more,with a mushroom cut [Noooooooo] wait's not over and yes she was bred in Kanpur..[Noooooo,God Bless You my Child] and yes she bathes like once a month and we call her by a special name..[for her friendship sake,I'm not speaking it with all the sound effects]"She spoke about all the action there and filled me with info till I almost choked with the popcorn bucket in my throat.It was hillarious,but at the same time really freaked me out.What if I have to go to a place like Meerut University for my graduation? What if my college friends? are all the same like the people at my school?
The problem is,I cant really gulp the whole idea of meeting people and sticking with their dysfunctional behaviour for the sake of talking.Now this time itself,I went for Pandal-hopping with a bunch of friends,not close exactly but good company.Strangely my idea of fun,being an agnostic to such places is capture the mood anc the whole scene with my photographs,of all the things that attract my attention,be it the security personnel on duty sleeping or the architectural beauty of the place.I do that a lot,and all my friends appreciate that,even if they dont atleast they do acknowledge it in some way.For that sake even my folks look forward to all that.I think its beacause of the wannabe journalist in me,but that's what helped me and I.F. gain the intern.This time whatever I clicked,wherever I went,my group seemed to have a furry little problem.One said I was acting like a tourist from a Phoren land while the other continuously sang the chorus of returning back because I was the reason they missed their Physics tuition/boy-toy seeing session.The crowd was intoxicated with the Pujo festivities and there was flamboyance and carnival like aura around the whole place,inspite of the Bomb Scare.Naturally it was worth staying even if it meant to look at Intellectual guys in Kurta's hitting on wannabe Bong scarlets.Yet I didn't enjoy myself like the crazy fun we had last year.And i didn't hog on to the food ,which is why I go every year.My excuse to fall for it,the melt in mouth kebabs from Karim,the Herb chicken Shawarma from Al-Bake which leaves a tender flavour in your mouth and the regular Jhal-muri,Chicken-egg-mutton rolls,mughlai parotha etc.
And one of the weak humourous thing that happened was again during the same conversation with Spellbee. I was really sleepy and we couldn't exactly figure out where-how etc to meet and I had an accounts test on Issue Of Shares,which I didn't want to screw.So I wanted to back out of the whole affaire and I ended up texting Mumjane about the the whole I-need-to-study routine.Within seconds the suit followed and Spellbee was on the line,"..Listen ok tell me what have you been reading lately?","ehm see all my books have been taken,but..hey I read this book on Marxist and Marxism ..Yeah i suppose that was it.".."ok then,good,TEAR THAT GODDAMN BOOK,Just tear that thing right away,burn it to hell..Stop reading such things on Earth and meet me at the Art Gallery tomorrow.",I was devious.

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  1. modimirror? LMAO!Who is this earthling?
    BTW,din't you have fun at the pujo?? Who went with you..? And sup with all the weird creatures...?You have got me thinking about my college days..I dont wanna end up in some unknown university 46474983270498 miles from the city..And i would die if i had a mushroom head bong as my roomie..
    You;ve got me thinking big time dude!

  2. Lol,don't make me speak more,or else that person shall hunt me and a cold blooded murder might take place ;) Went with the same group like last year.And hey I'm hoping to get some friends like that in college,It'll help me blog better ;) and it's her double agony that she is a complete vegan and being a bong her roomie is a die-hard non vegetarian .

  3. Hi. Saw your comment on my page. Thanks. Get in touch if you can. It's actually quite interesting you said: 'etymology' in my mind, but something standard in speech. Yeah, I know - it's quite complicated when even meaningful words need 'standard' translation. Lol.

  4. God.. Your stuff is just awesome and worth reading actually, compared to those people who hv nothin to write on their blog post except wat coloredpants they wore to office or how did they finally learn to cook baingan ka bharta and all.. Your vocabulary is superb.. I can bet there wud b a few souls like you on this planet who can speak such proper, meaningful english, and its not just that u sumhow fitted in strange uncommon words in your post but they actually make sense.. A round of applause..

  5. @ Arjun- Thanks; half of the conversations in my head don't come out due to this reason,otherwise the term "toffee nosed lass" springs into life.
    Sure dude,I'd be more than pleased to be in touch with "An English Literature" student.
    @Shruti-Thanks girl,I think I am yet to reach that level of perfection in terms of Wren and Martin,long way to go.


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